Our fake lifes on FB

An average person uses 1 to 2 hours daily on Facebook. Here we post edited photos and try to look a little better than we actually are. We scroll through our FB-page looking on who liked, shared and think about who did not like our photo of the food you are eat yesterday.

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Today we find FB as the biggest social network on the planet. Millions live connected to this digital platform; they do nothing without documenting it on their FB-page. They wake up and check FB, they check FB during the complete day and finish the day with a last scroll through FB. Who know what has happened since the last time you checked. If you wake up during night time you take a quick FB-check again. A moderate estimate of a normal FB-user is 2 hour of FB- scrolling a day. This is actually 6 months of all you awake time in 4 years; just scrolling, pressing likes on photos, sharing words of wisdom you randomly found someplace, thinking about all your friends (that you actually don’t know) and editing your photos before posting them. 6 months constructing a life of nothingness. Every year you sit for about 5 week’s morning to night, just looking on your telephone or PC  pressing… scrolling, pressing… While your life is passing around you; for every hour that passes we get one step closer to our grave.

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On FB we look at others fake life’s, peeking into the sphere of others, and try to look better than them.  Search for old friends and think about what happened with them. Who managed best? Compare their car with yours, their house, their Christmas three, their activities and whatever we want to compare. Nobody see you, and you got free access; directly into their edited life’s. We love to search for others, and for them to envy our edited life.

FB has created a need in us, or perhaps more correctly activated a need, by facilitating our passion for recognition.  When others press like on the photo of your family – you feel good. If a person shares your photo of your egg & bacon and writes this is the perfect meal – you feel proud. If a person comments your meaning about Donald Trump – you feel intellectual. When people want to become your friend – you feel popular. It seems that it does not matter that your photos were photo shopped, the person sharing your eggs were your mam, that you copied the words about Donald Trump from CNN and that you have no idea about who 854 of your friends are. We feel stimulated… stimulated by the excretion of the dopamine from our award centre in our brain. When changes happens on our FB page we feel joy, satisfaction and on the top of the world. The key to the FB-stimulation is the possibility the feedback from others. Well, feedback might be the wrong word. Most of us feel obligated to press like, to share and to comment others. FB tells us when it is time to congratulate our “friends” with their birthday. Then actually, who is congratulating… you or FB? Most Facebookers scroll their own page and press obligated on others pages, just sufficient to get more traffic on their own FB-page. FB is like fishing. You need to use the proper bait to get likes; generate traffic. FB is not really about sharing, it is about dopamine secretion – self stimulation; a virtual masturbation.

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People start relatively humble, and slowly the FB-spirit start taking control. Perhaps we should say the FB-Demon possesses us, starts to live our lives. Just as children like McDonalds and Happy meal, Facebookers get addicted to the concept. For every day that passes the person uses more and more time online on FB, become less moderate and more artificial. The plastic fantastic spirit grows. The grey everyday life does not create likes. Perhaps a button for “piety” or “i don’t care” would be more proper, but we press “like” all day long on the edited life of others. Hoping they will return the favour, or minimum prove their friendship. Good friends press like; always!  FB creates an illusion of our lives. An illusion where you edit your own life, and then you project it to all your pseudo friends; creating external likes and internal dopamine. It seems that it does not matter that your self-image is totally turned away from reality. Sitting there as a total fraud, projecting what you wish you have been. Others do the same, and together the FB-spiral pulls the egos upward. Like a lonely soul on steroids for virtual false success.  Projecting what you would like to have been might sound strange, but in a way it projects your inner wishes. Perhaps we might say that FB-pity is the difference between projected life and real life.

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While sitting there you press on some ads that “accidently” pops up and money goes directly to the bank account of FB and Mark Zuckerberg. I am sure that 99.9% of all persons on FB do not really care about the ads. They don’t see them, because they are passive FB-scrollers. They do not have any deeper sense of communicating on FB. They just want to continue their addiction for attention and the feeling of being loved by pressing like and share what other might “like”.

Is it possible to log off FB? Technically yes. Delete the account is more time consuming, but also possible (the last 6 years). Of course emotionally it is difficult; remember we are addicted; Addicted just as people become addicted to alcohol, cocaine and sex. It is like feeling that you leave your friends and family. Perhaps more correctly, you leave what creates a pleasant hormonal movement in your body. FB knows everything about you; they play you with this knowledge. When things happens they inform you, send you tailored ads, suggest friends for you, provide contact to people far away and is your everything. Since you started with FB your other social network have disappeared, and FB is what you are left with. Everything happens around your FB-page and your friends arrange everything around FB-groups. Well, who are actually your friends? Will you get lonely if you cut the contact with all these unknown and distal people that are labelled as “Friend”? Most likely you do not know them, and you mean as little for them as them for you. This is just a number in the collection of numbers labelled as “friends”. Exactly as little important as the number of “likes” the photo of your dinner got yesterday.

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Before you lived inside your mind, but now you live scrolling FB. Our mind weakens as FB gets stronger. We become superficial and self-centered. Perhaps we randomly post some nice deep words for thought, quotations from Nelson Mandela and Dalai Lama, but do we feel these words? Well, the chance for that you are a genuine deep thinker and empathically Facebooker is really low. A best case scenario of small reposts of Youtube videos showing sentimental moments are that you liked the video, but most likely it is your subconscious searching for more “likes”. FB is mental fast food; social-noise and a dopamine stimulator. You (temporarily) lose the ability to independently live a life and enjoy the moment. You live for others on FB, and you gain hormonal stimulation as a reward.  Is it worth 5 weeks a year? Of course not! Your prime of your life is passing quickly. Enjoy it…

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